We're our own worst enemy at times...

We’re our own worst enemies at times.

Judging ourselves harshly against an image of perfection that we rarely attain.

It’s a bar that is less there for us to reach and more there for us to beat ourselves with.

Talking to my clients it’s almost effortless to see how amazing they are - and to tell them this, bringing it to the surface so they can grow from a different place - yet it’s much harder I turn the spotlight on myself and do the same.

(That’s why I have coaches and mentors, because they help me to work through that)

One of the places that I have been overly critical is my body.

And it’s no secret that can get a bit down about my body.

Carrying more weight than I would like.

Back is a it twisted from the Spina Bifida.

And my legs are different sizes.

(I’m a real catch )

Buying clothes has been particularly entertaining over the years.

A balance between what fits and what doesn’t damage me in some way.

But when I do find clothes that fit, I’ll buy them until they stop making them.

I was out buying shirts for the show last week, and in one shop I tried on a couple of shirts and just before I put my own clothes back on, I caught sight of myself in the mirror.

And in that moment I felt something different.

A complete respect and love for the body I could see in the mirror.

(There was also a bit of “it’s not as bad as you think mate”, but the sense of comfort was beautiful)

The mirror arrangement allowed me to see the scar on back, and to view myself from an angle that i don’t often see.

It was a moment of complete peace.

What do you do in that moment? You take a picture.

One that will never get shown to anyone else.

And would be deleted pretty quickly following some uncomfortable thoughts.

Or at least that’s what the old Dave would have done.

The one who didn’t want to be seen.

Or judged by anyone else.

The one that wanted to engineer this perfect persona for the world to see.

But I am not that Dave anymore.

(And thank fuck for that)

There are bits and pieces around still, but that’s part of the journey, right?

Don’t get me wrong, posting this image feels very uncomfortable - I’ve hovered over the delete button more than you can imagine - but I would prefer you see me and make your own choice